Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Who Is Voodoo? Part 1

How does one describe themselves to the world without blurring the lines of fact and fiction? For most, this would be a difficult task. After all, you want to be found interesting, intriguing and capable of outputting noteworthy blogs right? So, most would tend to embellish their resume and exaggerate their achievements in order to have their subjective thoughts viewed by the masses as credible and transcendent. Not I. I do not need to embellish nor exaggerate for I am truly the most interesting man in the world.
Born in 1977 in the little Italy section of Toronto, Canada, I was a fearless trouble making wild child from the very beginning. My father, a city bus driver with an iron fist and a "don't fuck with me" attitude had to constantly remove his belt and paint my ass red. My mother, a stay at home mom was equality brutal when it came to corporal punishment. Every beating was rightfully administered. I was a bad kid and I got what I deserved. Today I have nothing but love and respect for my parents for putting up with such an evil little shit. If it were not for their tough love, I would be in prison today.
As a teenager, my passion for causing mischief and playing hockey was quickly rivaled by a new found love. The power of the pussy. So infatuated did I become with this mysterious and amazing part of the female anatomy that I would eventually become a professional sex worker. A Porn Star.
It all started in 1984 when MTV released the "Like A Virgin" video by that sexy icon Madonna. At the tender age of seven I discovered masturbation. I had been having wet dreams for some time already but watching Madonna exude such perverted sexuality had me needing to touch myself and release the built up of poison in my loins. The shower was the destination and my body was the experimentation. I made two important discoveries that night which have had real profound effects on the rest of life. The female body affects me tremendously in such a physical and psychological manner that I may actually have developed a drug like dependence on it. And that I am capable of having multiple orgasms several times a day. Becoming a porn star was my destiny. How it all came to be is an amazing story.



3 comments:

  1. oh voodoo if only you knew the influence you have had on me!! ;-) am v.happy to see your blog xxxxxx

    ReplyDelete
  2. omfg ... this is so stupid crazy funny. You're like MG Mudbone ... but white ...

    ReplyDelete